We all know what rape is, or do we? As a rule, we consider it to be a sexual act without the consent of the victim and that it happens in the physical world.
But what about on social media?
There appears to be a large number of men out there that seem to believe that sex talking to a woman over social media is acceptable, regardless of whether she has consented or not. Is this not another kind of rape? Or because it isn’t “hands on” it doesn’t count as rape? It is a question I am trying to find an answer to.
All though it is not physical it is no less damaging to a woman’s belief that she has the right to decide how others should treat her because she is a woman.
How many times have we heard that it doesn’t matter what she wore, if she was drunk or how she behaved, without her consent it is rape? Well, surely the same applies to social media. If she hasn’t agreed to his sexual advances and dirty talk then surely it isn’t acceptable. It is rape in a different format. That being the case, many men seem not to understand this fact.
When making new friends on social media it is wise to be careful, we know that, but there is no way of knowing how a person is going to interact with you unless you give them a chance to. Now in a lot of cases it all starts off polite and with small talk, much like any friendship. There may be the odd naughty joke or sexual innuendo, is that a sign that you have just befriended a rapist? Sometimes people use the wrong word in the wrong place and it comes over as ambiguous and you are not sure quite what is meant. With the differences in languages this is a common problem. How do you make the correct judgement?
Thank the Goddess for the block button. At the first sign of inappropriate behaviour we can hit the block function but by then the damage is done. The man has already insulted her and treated her as nothing more than a sex object. He has raped her. Not physically but mentally.
So, Men, before you even think of sending her a message that is sexual, or that picture of your genitalia or that porn clip ask her if she wants to be treated in that way. Maybe she will enjoy that kind of friendship, maybe she won’t. Either way she has the right to decide for herself.
If this hasn’t made an impact, let me put it to you in a different way.
Those women you chat up are someone’s mother, sister or wife. How would you feel if some man showed such disrespect to your female loved one? How would you feel when she feels degraded and humiliated? Would you be happy with that, would you say she is making mountains out of molehills?
I’m fairly sure that in the vast majority of cases you would be very angry that some man could be so disrespectful to her. And yet, you continue to treat someone else’s female loved with the same disrespect.
Harsh as I sound, any man who does not have a woman’s permission to interact in a sexual manner with her, whether it is physically or on social media is a rapist!